Monday 10 June 2019

guilt

what is this guilt
this deep, strong
guilt of living, of life?
what is the word for it?

climbing the stairs and panting
guilt
sleeping safely in a room
occasionally waking up with a few mosquito bites
guilt
going to watch a movie
and feeling courageous of not conforming
guilt
eating, thrice a day, sometimes even more
and then exercising to lose it
guilt
the sheer possibility to waste,
tons and tons of waste
guilt
to be waited upon
guilt
getting paid at the end of the month
and paying, as well
guilt
having opinions and the liberty to voice them out
and accumulate likes on social media
guilt
missing home, family
guilt
writing poems

how is it possible to be guilty
and cherish the reason behind it,
at the same time?
to preserve it, the guilt, within,
to not let it out,
to cage it inside
and remain punished solely by oneself?